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Doctor Who Fic: Without a Doubt, Jack/Nine/Rose 2/3
Without a Doubt, by Joolz
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When the Doctor turned his attention back to his companions, Jack was leaning against the door of the Tardis, arms crossed in front of his chest, head fallen back, eyes closed. Rose took a few steps towards him, then stopped. She said, “I’m sorry.”
Jack’s head snapped up and he looked at her, eyebrows drawn together. “What?”
“You heard me,” Rose said with a bit of returning vigour. “I said I’m sorry. That was wrong. It was just all wrong.”
“Yeah,” Jack drawled, as though she’d announced that water was wet. “Those people were some sick fuckers. But none of it was your fault.”
“But it is,” she said unhappily. “It is. You died…” Her lower lip started to tremble.
Jack pushed away from the wall and walked toward her. “I didn’t! I’m still alive. Right here. See?” He took her hand and thwapped her palm against his chest.
She melted against him and he wrapped his arms around her. The Doctor could see her shoulders shaking. She was crying again.
“But you would have,” she insisted between sniffs. “If it had been real. You would be dead now.”
“Rose. Rose, stop,” Jack said with dismay. “It was a stupid VR simulation, nothing more. And I made my own choice, nothing to do with you.”
“You don’t understand!” Rose insisted, her composure returning with her indignation. “You died in my scenario, too. Because I knew the Doctor would choose to save me, and he did. I froze and couldn’t think of any way to stop it. So they killed you, just like that. And it was wrong! I knew the Doctor would choose me and you thought he should choose me and that’s not right! Why should you die? I don’t deserve to live more than you do! It’s just stupid, sexist bullshit. Must protect the defenceless little girl,” she said disdainfully.
Jack hugged her close, then replied, “There are a lot of reasons why. For one, I’ve been a soldier. I chose to put the lives of other people before my own and was prepared to die. Okay, I’m a little more selective now about who I’m willing to kill and die for, but you definitely qualify. I’d die for you any day, Rose, and wouldn’t consider it a tragedy.
“Also,” he went on, “I’m nearly twice your age. I’ve had a hell of a life already, but you’re just getting started. If you had the chance to protect a ten year old kid, you’d do it, right? Even if it meant dying. It’s an instinct, and a good one.
“And the Doctor is responsible for you; he has to keep you safe. I should have known it wasn’t real when the Doctor chose me over you, because that would never happen, and it shouldn’t. It was totally out of character. I can take care of myself. You don’t have the training or the experience to deal with that kind of thing, and I hope you never do. The way your scenario went, that’s what I would have wanted. Please don’t feel bad about it.”
Rose had stopped sniffling, but was still holding Jack close. “Not convinced, you idiot,” she complained and thumped him on the shoulder.
The Doctor stood apart, watching and listening to their conversation, his anger growing. It had increased to a level he couldn’t contain any more and the Doctor thought he might explode. He looked at them standing wrapped around each other. They fit so well together; her blonde hair and softness, his darker colouring and strength. They were both so beautiful it made his hearts hurt. Which was why they were in so much trouble.
It was very, very hard, but he managed to move his jaw enough to speak through gritted teeth. “You think you know me.”
At his quiet, forced words, Jack and Rose turned to look at him. Their eyes widened in a way that under other circumstances might have been amusing. Neither of them had seen the full fury of the ‘Oncoming Storm’ before, and they were both a little scared.
As they should be.
Jack swallowed and said, “What?”
“You think you know me, what I would do in that situation,” he spat. “You’re wrong.” The last word was a low, dangerous rumble. “You and your tiny, limited little ape brains. You can only understand yes or no, one or the other. Like I would stand there and choose which one of you would die.”
“But,” Rose ventured, “they said they would kill us both if you didn’t. Do you mean that…?”
The Doctor took one step forward and the other two tightened their hold on each other reflexively.
“No, Rose Tyler, that’s not what I mean,” he said derisively. “Why don’t you ask me, eh? Ask me what happened in my scenario instead of assuming you know.”
“Okay,” she said slowly, as if calming a wild animal. “What?”
The Doctor looked back and forth between them. “Did I blithely say, yeah, sure, kill Jack, or kill Rose? Not bloody likely. You wanna know what I did? When it became apparent that there was no reasoning with them, I used the sonic screwdriver to shatter the glass in the lanterns. The burning oil caught the tapestries on fire, and in the confusion we escaped. All of us. Nobody died.”
Jack made a face. “And they thought my result was the best? That’s way better. They must be….” He trailed off under the Doctor’s glare.
“It was just one of dozens, hundreds of possible outcomes where nobody died. Hundreds. But neither of you trusted me to come up with even one. No, you both thought that I would choose one of you and stand back. Nice to know that’s all you think of me.”
Shaking his head, Jack said, “No,” but the Doctor wouldn’t let him talk.
“And you!” he said to Jack. “If you think what you did was acceptable, if you don’t believe in me enough to expect my help, then tell me now and I’ll drop you off somewhere, because I don’t want you here!” The Doctor was aware that he might be overreacting just a bit, but the image of Jack run through with a spear, dying at his feet, was going to give the Doctor nightmares, as if he needed more.
“I didn’t see any other option,” the younger man protested.
“There’s always another option!” the Doctor bellowed.
“No there isn’t!” Jack yelled back. “You know that. You can’t always save everyone.”
The Doctor opened his mouth to argue, but Jack took two steps forward and pointed a finger at the Doctor.
“No! Now you listen to me. I do believe in you, Doctor, more than I’ve ever believed in anyone in my life. I was waiting for you to do something. When you didn’t and they were about to kill Rose it was too late to try anything else.”
The Doctor snarled, “Well, you must not have believed very much. If the virtual reality was responding to our minds, you apparently thought my presence was worth sod all.”
“We don’t know that!” Jack insisted vehemently. “We don’t know to what extent we were able to control how the scenario played out. If it only responded to our expectations, you would have saved Rose instead of me, because that’s what I thought would happen. They were just playing with us.”
Some of the anger left the Doctor. It was true; they didn’t know how the Decartian technology worked. Yes, it could be that subconsciously Jack wanted the Doctor to put him first, but even in his agitated state the Doctor recognized the circular reasoning that line of thought could lead to.
“As much as I admire you,” Jack went on, “I’m not ever going to sit passively and wait for you to make all the decisions and tell me how to act. If that’s what you expect, then you’d better drop me off somewhere. I’m a grown man, Doctor. At least respect me enough to let me make my own decisions about how to live, or how to die if it comes to that.”
The Doctor deflated some more. It was kind of arrogant to expect Jack to do something the Doctor himself would never submit to.
“And if it does come to that,” Jack continued, “you’d better understand that I would die to protect Rose or to protect you. Don’t ask me to be a person who would stand by and let someone he loved be hurt.”
The Doctor looked at Jack, really looked at him. Jack had endless passion for life, a huge heart and more intelligence than you would expect from someone who looked like he did, and it all shone on his face as he confronted the Doctor. He hadn’t always had a very high opinion of Jack, the younger man still had a lot to learn, but he had demonstrated his willingness to sacrifice himself to protect others on the first day they had met. And no, he didn’t really want Jack to change.
The Doctor said, in a more even tone than before, “You said that you’re almost twice Rose’s age. I’m more than twenty-five times your age, Jack.” He saw his eyes widen with shock as Jack did the calculation in his head. “How do you think I feel watching you die, watching any of you die? I’ve lost companions before.” He let that information sink in. “It’s not something I take lightly. You’re not expendable. Either of you.”
Jack’s face softened with understanding, and he said kindly, “Well, I hope you don’t have to go through it again any time soon. Personally, I plan on living a long time.”
“Just promise me you won’t do anything like you did today unless you’re really sure there are no other options. Really sure.”
Jack smiled and saluted. “I can promise that. No unnecessary deaths, sir!”
“All right, then.” The Doctor stepped closer to Jack, so they were looking into each others’ eyes. “I hate what you did today, Captain, but I am proud of you.”
The grin Jack gave him was almost shy, an attractive look on him, and the Doctor’s stomach fluttered.
The Doctor was never really sure what made him do what he did next. It might have been the adrenaline wearing off, it might have been temporary insanity, or it might just have been the blue of Jack’s eyes. In any event, he cupped a hand against Jack’s jaw line, leaned in, and kissed him.
Jack went still for a moment, then reached up to cradle the nape of the Doctor’s neck, holding him in place so he could deepen the kiss. It wasn’t the same as the spiritual connection the Doctor had experienced with other Time Lords, with his wife, but Jack was warm, the beard stubble scratching the Doctor’s chin felt real and intimate, and his mouth was talented. It was a very good kiss; Jack’s self-promotion in that area hadn’t been an exaggeration. It wasn’t the same as with someone of his own species, but it was enough.
Jack slid his other arm slowly around the Doctor’s waist, as though afraid the Doctor would bolt if startled, which wasn’t far off the mark. The feeling of Jack’s hand splayed on his lower back sent pulses of heat throughout his body, something he hadn’t felt in a long time.
In for a penny, in for a pound, he thought, and wrapped his arms around Jack, pulling the other man even closer. It was a heady feeling, the solid male body against his, combined with the tenderness of his touch. He could sense how much Jack loved him, and was honoured by it.
They caressed each other with lips and hands, then the Doctor pressed his forehead to Jack’s, and just breathed in his scent. It was all very good.
There was a movement to the Doctor’s right, and both men turned their heads. Rose was staring at them with her mouth hanging open. The Doctor had actually forgotten she was there. He started to step back, apologising, “Oh, sorry, we were….” He stopped, smiling at Rose’s gob smacked expression. “Rose?” he asked.
She shook herself. “Oh. My. God. That was the hottest thing I’ve ever…. There are no,” she had to take a breath, “words. Do that again.”
“You mean this?” Jack asked cheekily, then leaned in to nibble his way up the Doctor’s neck. The Doctor hmmmed in approval.
Rose nodded, her mouth hanging open again.
“Or this?” the Doctor asked, then slid a hand up under Jack’s t-shirt and skimmed it over his chest, making Jack gasp.
“Yeah,” she croaked. “That.”
Part of him wanted to continue groping Jack, but that didn’t feel quite right anymore, not with Rose as an audience. Jack must have been thinking the same thing because, eyes twinkling, he looked at the Doctor and motioned with his head toward Rose. The Doctor failed to keep a straight face as he nodded his agreement.
Jack released him, turned to Rose, and pulled her against his body. “Maybe you’d rather have some of this yourself.” Not giving her time to answer, he kissed her, bending her backward slightly. Her arms came up enthusiastically to encircle his neck.
The Doctor watched them with contentment. He had been resistant to Jack’s presence with them at first, in part because of the instant attraction Jack and Rose had felt for each other. Not that he had Captain Envy, no matter what Rose said. Well, maybe a little. But despite the chemistry between them, out of deference for the Doctor’s feelings they had kept their relationship completely platonic. Now the Doctor knew that Jack wouldn’t try to come between him and Rose, and that made it all right to see them express their desire.
It forced a decision on him, though. The Doctor could back off and pretend none of it had happened, and things could go back to how they were. Sort of. They were all good at denial, but a line had been crossed that would be hard to re-establish – and the Doctor had been the one to cross it.
Or he could give Rose and Jack his blessings, and encourage them to build a relationship. That’s what he should do, the right and generous thing. They were humans; they could be happy together. It would end with them leaving him, though, and sooner rather than later. There was too much between them all for it to be a comfortable situation.
Or he could join them, take the same step with Rose that he had with Jack. He could accept what had been simmering beneath the surface all along, and express it the way humans needed it expressed. That was the wrong thing to do; wrong for him and wrong for them, because it couldn’t end well.
But the Doctor wanted it. He wanted it so much in that moment, to be allowed the simple pleasure of loving and being loved. Rose and Jack made it seem possible, like it was right there waiting for him to reach out his hand. It was an illusion, but maybe it could be real. Maybe he could make it real enough through the force of his will, by simply not admitting otherwise.
The Doctor looked at those three potential futures spinning out from them. Those and hundreds of other permutations of possibility flowing around them like a river. One strand stood out as a glowing beacon, shining more brightly than any other. The Doctor could try to follow it. He could try.
Jack stood Rose upright, and the kiss ended. She grinned up at him, her hands on his shoulders, “That was a bit of all right.”
The Doctor put his hands on his hips. “Oi! If you like that, wait until you try this!”
He stepped forward and pulled Rose to him. Sliding his hands down her back to grip her arse, he took her mouth. It was so sweet to taste Rose, finally. The sweetness of her, with a hint of Jack-seasoning mixed in. Bloody perfect. She melted in his arms and gave him everything he asked of her and more. He poured his hopes and desires into her, and she took them without reservation.
When he broke away, she blinked at him, stunned. “Oh.”
The Doctor grinned at her. “Pretty good, that, eh?”
She nodded happily in reply.
Glancing at Jack, the Doctor found him watching them, his arms folded across his chest, with a sad smile on his face. He thought they were going to exclude him again.
Exasperated, the Doctor said, “Jack Harkness, when are you going to learn?” and shifted both himself and Rose until he could get an arm around Jack’s waist and kiss him briefly. “All right? Do you get it?”
Jack’s smile was blinding. “Oh yeah, and I hope you’ll really give it to me very soon.”
This time the Doctor laughed at Jack’s trademark innuendo. “I think you can count on it.”
Rose grabbed his arm and Jack’s. “Can we, Doctor? Can we really be together? Do you mean it?”
“Didn’t I just say that?” he bantered, quashing his doubts. For better or for worse, they were going to do this.
Rose threw herself at Jack, who swung her around in a circle. Then she threw herself at the Doctor, almost knocking him over. “Come on, then,” she crowed. “You both need to get your kit off, right now!”
She grabbed their hands and pulled them toward the hallway. The Doctor grinned at Jack and quipped, “Excitable thing, in’t she?”
“No more than I am,” Jack answered. “Hurry up!” He took the lead and towed them down the corridor.
Their enthusiasm was endearing. It was one of the things he loved about them, their joy in living. He couldn’t quite match it himself most of the time, but they reminded him why it was important to keep trying.
A door opened suddenly as they passed it, revealing a room none of them had seen before. Proud of his ship, the Doctor said, “I think you’ll find that the Tardis has anticipated our needs.”
They all crowded through the doorway, and inside they found a large bed with a tube of slick prominently placed on one pillow. The room was lit by candles, which reflected off the mirror in the en suite bathroom.
Jack beamed. “I knew I liked this ship!” He grabbed the hem of his shirt and stripped it off in one motion. “Now you, Doctor,” he urged.
The Doctor shrugged and let his jacket slide off his arms onto the floor. He then repeated the same motion Jack had used to rid himself of his own t-shirt. A less confident man might have felt a bit inadequate standing shirtless next to Jack, especially if he was a bit older, and not quite as fit. It was a good thing the Doctor was confident – though it also helped that Jack was looking at him like he wanted to eat him with a spoon.
The Doctor reached out and took hold of the first button on Jack’s jeans, slipping his fingers in behind the waist band. “Need some help with this?”
Jack nodded and breathed, “Yeah,” happiness and arousal combining on his face.
He popped the first button open, then moved his hands down to the second. Jack’s breath caught, and the Doctor could feel him hardening beneath the denim. With a smug grin, the Doctor slowly worked his way down the row, being sure to brush Jack’s growing erection frequently. Then he pushed the fabric away and let Jack’s cock spring free before sliding the jeans over bare hips to fall to the floor. His eyes wide and dark, Jack toed his shoes off and stepped out of the last of his clothes.
The Doctor would have been happy to stand there and look at Jack, but the younger man had other ideas. Jack dropped to his knees, gripped the Doctor’s hips and rubbed his face against his crotch. That felt fantastic, and the Doctor carded his fingers through Jack’s hair. Jack unzipped the Doctor’s trousers and worked them and his underwear down his legs, lifting each foot to remove the boot and sock as well. He then sat back on his heels and looked at the Doctor’s cock.
He didn’t have the hair trigger that Jack did, but the Doctor was beginning to respond. Jack looked up at him with a warm smile. “I had wondered, you know, if you’d be different here.”
“Everything up to your standard?” the Doctor teased.
There was that brilliant smile again. “Oh, yeah!” He wrapped one hand around the Doctor’s cock and stroked a couple of times before releasing it. Then Jack turned to look at Rose. “And don’t think we’ve forgotten about you, young lady.”
Rose was watching them with glee, her lower lip sucked between her teeth. “You two are so gorgeous,” she said, “I can hardly believe you’re real.”
The Doctor said to Jack, “I think she’s fallen a bit behind. It’s our duty to help her catch us up, don’t you agree?”
“Absolutely,” Jack confirmed. He stood, and the two men approached Rose. They began to undress her together, in perfect coordination. Jack unzipped her hoodie jacket and the Doctor slid his hand inside over her t-shirt to cup a breast. The Doctor pulled her hair back to kiss her throat and Jack skimmed his hands up the skin of her back to unfasten her bra. She raised her arms in the air, and both men helped lift her shirt and bra away.
Standing back, they examined her appreciatively. She let them look, a little shy, a little impish. Jack and the Doctor each took a breast in one hand and wrapped the other arm around her back, holding her to them. Then they took turns kissing her as she craned her head eagerly to reach their mouths.
After a quick eye signal, the men bent to each suck a nipple into their mouths. Rose cried out and grasped their shoulders desperately. While they were down there, the Doctor unzipped her jeans and Jack slid his fingers under her panties. Almost immediately her hips bucked, she cried, “Oh! Oh!” and her whole body shuddered.
Jack and the Doctor grinned at each other triumphantly, and the Doctor noticed they were taking more of Rose’s weight on their shoulders as she relaxed. Jack picked her up and lay her at the edge of the bed so that he and the Doctor could finish stripping her of her jeans and sneakers, then Jack shifted her to the middle of the mattress, her head resting on a pillow, her body sprawled openly.
There had never been any doubt in the Doctor’s mind but that she would be beautiful, and she certainly was. About many things in life there were many options, but right now he had no choice but to crawl on top of her and kiss her. The heat of her body, the softness of her skin against his, her arms around him, felt better than he could have imagined.
It was admittedly odd to be doing this with a human, with humans, but it had been such a long time for him that his body didn’t care. This woman he cared about deeply. The man he’d known a shorter time, but he had gotten under the Doctor’s skin with surgical precision. Aesthetically, both his companions were stunning, but that alone wouldn’t have caught the Doctor’s attention. A man who had worn nine different bodies knew better than most that physical appearance was really the least important thing about a person. They were beautiful inside, too. Whatever they wanted, whatever he could give them, he would.
After several minutes of concentrated snogging he felt Jack’s hands on him, and realized that the other man was trying to guide him off of Rose. The Doctor lifted his mouth away from Rose’s reluctantly, but relaxed and trusted those hands to direct him onto his back next to her.
After leaning over the Doctor to drop a quick kiss on his lips, Jack moved down and without preamble took the Doctor’s cock into his mouth. The Doctor couldn’t help but groan – the heat, the suction, the stretch of Jack’s mouth around him, that thing he was doing with his tongue – it was almost too much. He quickly finished hardening, to an almost painful degree. He hadn’t been entirely sure he would be able to get there, but he shouldn’t have doubted, not with the inspiration he had to work with.
The Doctor gripped the bed sheets and closed his eyes, revelling in the pleasure running through his body. He whimpered a protest when the wet heat disappeared. Opening his eyes, he saw Jack positioning Rose over him, and guiding her down.
He locked eyes with Rose at the first touch of himself against her opening. He saw love and want, and hoped she saw the same thing in him. The Doctor felt a brief flash of gratitude to Jack. He wouldn’t have minded if Jack had wanted to take Rose first, but now found that it meant so much to him to be the one. He and Rose had grown closer than he had ever expected them to, and this moment was the affirmation of what they had become for each other.
Jack’s hands on her hips, Rose sank down onto him, and to the Doctor it felt like being home.
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part 3
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When the Doctor turned his attention back to his companions, Jack was leaning against the door of the Tardis, arms crossed in front of his chest, head fallen back, eyes closed. Rose took a few steps towards him, then stopped. She said, “I’m sorry.”
Jack’s head snapped up and he looked at her, eyebrows drawn together. “What?”
“You heard me,” Rose said with a bit of returning vigour. “I said I’m sorry. That was wrong. It was just all wrong.”
“Yeah,” Jack drawled, as though she’d announced that water was wet. “Those people were some sick fuckers. But none of it was your fault.”
“But it is,” she said unhappily. “It is. You died…” Her lower lip started to tremble.
Jack pushed away from the wall and walked toward her. “I didn’t! I’m still alive. Right here. See?” He took her hand and thwapped her palm against his chest.
She melted against him and he wrapped his arms around her. The Doctor could see her shoulders shaking. She was crying again.
“But you would have,” she insisted between sniffs. “If it had been real. You would be dead now.”
“Rose. Rose, stop,” Jack said with dismay. “It was a stupid VR simulation, nothing more. And I made my own choice, nothing to do with you.”
“You don’t understand!” Rose insisted, her composure returning with her indignation. “You died in my scenario, too. Because I knew the Doctor would choose to save me, and he did. I froze and couldn’t think of any way to stop it. So they killed you, just like that. And it was wrong! I knew the Doctor would choose me and you thought he should choose me and that’s not right! Why should you die? I don’t deserve to live more than you do! It’s just stupid, sexist bullshit. Must protect the defenceless little girl,” she said disdainfully.
Jack hugged her close, then replied, “There are a lot of reasons why. For one, I’ve been a soldier. I chose to put the lives of other people before my own and was prepared to die. Okay, I’m a little more selective now about who I’m willing to kill and die for, but you definitely qualify. I’d die for you any day, Rose, and wouldn’t consider it a tragedy.
“Also,” he went on, “I’m nearly twice your age. I’ve had a hell of a life already, but you’re just getting started. If you had the chance to protect a ten year old kid, you’d do it, right? Even if it meant dying. It’s an instinct, and a good one.
“And the Doctor is responsible for you; he has to keep you safe. I should have known it wasn’t real when the Doctor chose me over you, because that would never happen, and it shouldn’t. It was totally out of character. I can take care of myself. You don’t have the training or the experience to deal with that kind of thing, and I hope you never do. The way your scenario went, that’s what I would have wanted. Please don’t feel bad about it.”
Rose had stopped sniffling, but was still holding Jack close. “Not convinced, you idiot,” she complained and thumped him on the shoulder.
The Doctor stood apart, watching and listening to their conversation, his anger growing. It had increased to a level he couldn’t contain any more and the Doctor thought he might explode. He looked at them standing wrapped around each other. They fit so well together; her blonde hair and softness, his darker colouring and strength. They were both so beautiful it made his hearts hurt. Which was why they were in so much trouble.
It was very, very hard, but he managed to move his jaw enough to speak through gritted teeth. “You think you know me.”
At his quiet, forced words, Jack and Rose turned to look at him. Their eyes widened in a way that under other circumstances might have been amusing. Neither of them had seen the full fury of the ‘Oncoming Storm’ before, and they were both a little scared.
As they should be.
Jack swallowed and said, “What?”
“You think you know me, what I would do in that situation,” he spat. “You’re wrong.” The last word was a low, dangerous rumble. “You and your tiny, limited little ape brains. You can only understand yes or no, one or the other. Like I would stand there and choose which one of you would die.”
“But,” Rose ventured, “they said they would kill us both if you didn’t. Do you mean that…?”
The Doctor took one step forward and the other two tightened their hold on each other reflexively.
“No, Rose Tyler, that’s not what I mean,” he said derisively. “Why don’t you ask me, eh? Ask me what happened in my scenario instead of assuming you know.”
“Okay,” she said slowly, as if calming a wild animal. “What?”
The Doctor looked back and forth between them. “Did I blithely say, yeah, sure, kill Jack, or kill Rose? Not bloody likely. You wanna know what I did? When it became apparent that there was no reasoning with them, I used the sonic screwdriver to shatter the glass in the lanterns. The burning oil caught the tapestries on fire, and in the confusion we escaped. All of us. Nobody died.”
Jack made a face. “And they thought my result was the best? That’s way better. They must be….” He trailed off under the Doctor’s glare.
“It was just one of dozens, hundreds of possible outcomes where nobody died. Hundreds. But neither of you trusted me to come up with even one. No, you both thought that I would choose one of you and stand back. Nice to know that’s all you think of me.”
Shaking his head, Jack said, “No,” but the Doctor wouldn’t let him talk.
“And you!” he said to Jack. “If you think what you did was acceptable, if you don’t believe in me enough to expect my help, then tell me now and I’ll drop you off somewhere, because I don’t want you here!” The Doctor was aware that he might be overreacting just a bit, but the image of Jack run through with a spear, dying at his feet, was going to give the Doctor nightmares, as if he needed more.
“I didn’t see any other option,” the younger man protested.
“There’s always another option!” the Doctor bellowed.
“No there isn’t!” Jack yelled back. “You know that. You can’t always save everyone.”
The Doctor opened his mouth to argue, but Jack took two steps forward and pointed a finger at the Doctor.
“No! Now you listen to me. I do believe in you, Doctor, more than I’ve ever believed in anyone in my life. I was waiting for you to do something. When you didn’t and they were about to kill Rose it was too late to try anything else.”
The Doctor snarled, “Well, you must not have believed very much. If the virtual reality was responding to our minds, you apparently thought my presence was worth sod all.”
“We don’t know that!” Jack insisted vehemently. “We don’t know to what extent we were able to control how the scenario played out. If it only responded to our expectations, you would have saved Rose instead of me, because that’s what I thought would happen. They were just playing with us.”
Some of the anger left the Doctor. It was true; they didn’t know how the Decartian technology worked. Yes, it could be that subconsciously Jack wanted the Doctor to put him first, but even in his agitated state the Doctor recognized the circular reasoning that line of thought could lead to.
“As much as I admire you,” Jack went on, “I’m not ever going to sit passively and wait for you to make all the decisions and tell me how to act. If that’s what you expect, then you’d better drop me off somewhere. I’m a grown man, Doctor. At least respect me enough to let me make my own decisions about how to live, or how to die if it comes to that.”
The Doctor deflated some more. It was kind of arrogant to expect Jack to do something the Doctor himself would never submit to.
“And if it does come to that,” Jack continued, “you’d better understand that I would die to protect Rose or to protect you. Don’t ask me to be a person who would stand by and let someone he loved be hurt.”
The Doctor looked at Jack, really looked at him. Jack had endless passion for life, a huge heart and more intelligence than you would expect from someone who looked like he did, and it all shone on his face as he confronted the Doctor. He hadn’t always had a very high opinion of Jack, the younger man still had a lot to learn, but he had demonstrated his willingness to sacrifice himself to protect others on the first day they had met. And no, he didn’t really want Jack to change.
The Doctor said, in a more even tone than before, “You said that you’re almost twice Rose’s age. I’m more than twenty-five times your age, Jack.” He saw his eyes widen with shock as Jack did the calculation in his head. “How do you think I feel watching you die, watching any of you die? I’ve lost companions before.” He let that information sink in. “It’s not something I take lightly. You’re not expendable. Either of you.”
Jack’s face softened with understanding, and he said kindly, “Well, I hope you don’t have to go through it again any time soon. Personally, I plan on living a long time.”
“Just promise me you won’t do anything like you did today unless you’re really sure there are no other options. Really sure.”
Jack smiled and saluted. “I can promise that. No unnecessary deaths, sir!”
“All right, then.” The Doctor stepped closer to Jack, so they were looking into each others’ eyes. “I hate what you did today, Captain, but I am proud of you.”
The grin Jack gave him was almost shy, an attractive look on him, and the Doctor’s stomach fluttered.
The Doctor was never really sure what made him do what he did next. It might have been the adrenaline wearing off, it might have been temporary insanity, or it might just have been the blue of Jack’s eyes. In any event, he cupped a hand against Jack’s jaw line, leaned in, and kissed him.
Jack went still for a moment, then reached up to cradle the nape of the Doctor’s neck, holding him in place so he could deepen the kiss. It wasn’t the same as the spiritual connection the Doctor had experienced with other Time Lords, with his wife, but Jack was warm, the beard stubble scratching the Doctor’s chin felt real and intimate, and his mouth was talented. It was a very good kiss; Jack’s self-promotion in that area hadn’t been an exaggeration. It wasn’t the same as with someone of his own species, but it was enough.
Jack slid his other arm slowly around the Doctor’s waist, as though afraid the Doctor would bolt if startled, which wasn’t far off the mark. The feeling of Jack’s hand splayed on his lower back sent pulses of heat throughout his body, something he hadn’t felt in a long time.
In for a penny, in for a pound, he thought, and wrapped his arms around Jack, pulling the other man even closer. It was a heady feeling, the solid male body against his, combined with the tenderness of his touch. He could sense how much Jack loved him, and was honoured by it.
They caressed each other with lips and hands, then the Doctor pressed his forehead to Jack’s, and just breathed in his scent. It was all very good.
There was a movement to the Doctor’s right, and both men turned their heads. Rose was staring at them with her mouth hanging open. The Doctor had actually forgotten she was there. He started to step back, apologising, “Oh, sorry, we were….” He stopped, smiling at Rose’s gob smacked expression. “Rose?” he asked.
She shook herself. “Oh. My. God. That was the hottest thing I’ve ever…. There are no,” she had to take a breath, “words. Do that again.”
“You mean this?” Jack asked cheekily, then leaned in to nibble his way up the Doctor’s neck. The Doctor hmmmed in approval.
Rose nodded, her mouth hanging open again.
“Or this?” the Doctor asked, then slid a hand up under Jack’s t-shirt and skimmed it over his chest, making Jack gasp.
“Yeah,” she croaked. “That.”
Part of him wanted to continue groping Jack, but that didn’t feel quite right anymore, not with Rose as an audience. Jack must have been thinking the same thing because, eyes twinkling, he looked at the Doctor and motioned with his head toward Rose. The Doctor failed to keep a straight face as he nodded his agreement.
Jack released him, turned to Rose, and pulled her against his body. “Maybe you’d rather have some of this yourself.” Not giving her time to answer, he kissed her, bending her backward slightly. Her arms came up enthusiastically to encircle his neck.
The Doctor watched them with contentment. He had been resistant to Jack’s presence with them at first, in part because of the instant attraction Jack and Rose had felt for each other. Not that he had Captain Envy, no matter what Rose said. Well, maybe a little. But despite the chemistry between them, out of deference for the Doctor’s feelings they had kept their relationship completely platonic. Now the Doctor knew that Jack wouldn’t try to come between him and Rose, and that made it all right to see them express their desire.
It forced a decision on him, though. The Doctor could back off and pretend none of it had happened, and things could go back to how they were. Sort of. They were all good at denial, but a line had been crossed that would be hard to re-establish – and the Doctor had been the one to cross it.
Or he could give Rose and Jack his blessings, and encourage them to build a relationship. That’s what he should do, the right and generous thing. They were humans; they could be happy together. It would end with them leaving him, though, and sooner rather than later. There was too much between them all for it to be a comfortable situation.
Or he could join them, take the same step with Rose that he had with Jack. He could accept what had been simmering beneath the surface all along, and express it the way humans needed it expressed. That was the wrong thing to do; wrong for him and wrong for them, because it couldn’t end well.
But the Doctor wanted it. He wanted it so much in that moment, to be allowed the simple pleasure of loving and being loved. Rose and Jack made it seem possible, like it was right there waiting for him to reach out his hand. It was an illusion, but maybe it could be real. Maybe he could make it real enough through the force of his will, by simply not admitting otherwise.
The Doctor looked at those three potential futures spinning out from them. Those and hundreds of other permutations of possibility flowing around them like a river. One strand stood out as a glowing beacon, shining more brightly than any other. The Doctor could try to follow it. He could try.
Jack stood Rose upright, and the kiss ended. She grinned up at him, her hands on his shoulders, “That was a bit of all right.”
The Doctor put his hands on his hips. “Oi! If you like that, wait until you try this!”
He stepped forward and pulled Rose to him. Sliding his hands down her back to grip her arse, he took her mouth. It was so sweet to taste Rose, finally. The sweetness of her, with a hint of Jack-seasoning mixed in. Bloody perfect. She melted in his arms and gave him everything he asked of her and more. He poured his hopes and desires into her, and she took them without reservation.
When he broke away, she blinked at him, stunned. “Oh.”
The Doctor grinned at her. “Pretty good, that, eh?”
She nodded happily in reply.
Glancing at Jack, the Doctor found him watching them, his arms folded across his chest, with a sad smile on his face. He thought they were going to exclude him again.
Exasperated, the Doctor said, “Jack Harkness, when are you going to learn?” and shifted both himself and Rose until he could get an arm around Jack’s waist and kiss him briefly. “All right? Do you get it?”
Jack’s smile was blinding. “Oh yeah, and I hope you’ll really give it to me very soon.”
This time the Doctor laughed at Jack’s trademark innuendo. “I think you can count on it.”
Rose grabbed his arm and Jack’s. “Can we, Doctor? Can we really be together? Do you mean it?”
“Didn’t I just say that?” he bantered, quashing his doubts. For better or for worse, they were going to do this.
Rose threw herself at Jack, who swung her around in a circle. Then she threw herself at the Doctor, almost knocking him over. “Come on, then,” she crowed. “You both need to get your kit off, right now!”
She grabbed their hands and pulled them toward the hallway. The Doctor grinned at Jack and quipped, “Excitable thing, in’t she?”
“No more than I am,” Jack answered. “Hurry up!” He took the lead and towed them down the corridor.
Their enthusiasm was endearing. It was one of the things he loved about them, their joy in living. He couldn’t quite match it himself most of the time, but they reminded him why it was important to keep trying.
A door opened suddenly as they passed it, revealing a room none of them had seen before. Proud of his ship, the Doctor said, “I think you’ll find that the Tardis has anticipated our needs.”
They all crowded through the doorway, and inside they found a large bed with a tube of slick prominently placed on one pillow. The room was lit by candles, which reflected off the mirror in the en suite bathroom.
Jack beamed. “I knew I liked this ship!” He grabbed the hem of his shirt and stripped it off in one motion. “Now you, Doctor,” he urged.
The Doctor shrugged and let his jacket slide off his arms onto the floor. He then repeated the same motion Jack had used to rid himself of his own t-shirt. A less confident man might have felt a bit inadequate standing shirtless next to Jack, especially if he was a bit older, and not quite as fit. It was a good thing the Doctor was confident – though it also helped that Jack was looking at him like he wanted to eat him with a spoon.
The Doctor reached out and took hold of the first button on Jack’s jeans, slipping his fingers in behind the waist band. “Need some help with this?”
Jack nodded and breathed, “Yeah,” happiness and arousal combining on his face.
He popped the first button open, then moved his hands down to the second. Jack’s breath caught, and the Doctor could feel him hardening beneath the denim. With a smug grin, the Doctor slowly worked his way down the row, being sure to brush Jack’s growing erection frequently. Then he pushed the fabric away and let Jack’s cock spring free before sliding the jeans over bare hips to fall to the floor. His eyes wide and dark, Jack toed his shoes off and stepped out of the last of his clothes.
The Doctor would have been happy to stand there and look at Jack, but the younger man had other ideas. Jack dropped to his knees, gripped the Doctor’s hips and rubbed his face against his crotch. That felt fantastic, and the Doctor carded his fingers through Jack’s hair. Jack unzipped the Doctor’s trousers and worked them and his underwear down his legs, lifting each foot to remove the boot and sock as well. He then sat back on his heels and looked at the Doctor’s cock.
He didn’t have the hair trigger that Jack did, but the Doctor was beginning to respond. Jack looked up at him with a warm smile. “I had wondered, you know, if you’d be different here.”
“Everything up to your standard?” the Doctor teased.
There was that brilliant smile again. “Oh, yeah!” He wrapped one hand around the Doctor’s cock and stroked a couple of times before releasing it. Then Jack turned to look at Rose. “And don’t think we’ve forgotten about you, young lady.”
Rose was watching them with glee, her lower lip sucked between her teeth. “You two are so gorgeous,” she said, “I can hardly believe you’re real.”
The Doctor said to Jack, “I think she’s fallen a bit behind. It’s our duty to help her catch us up, don’t you agree?”
“Absolutely,” Jack confirmed. He stood, and the two men approached Rose. They began to undress her together, in perfect coordination. Jack unzipped her hoodie jacket and the Doctor slid his hand inside over her t-shirt to cup a breast. The Doctor pulled her hair back to kiss her throat and Jack skimmed his hands up the skin of her back to unfasten her bra. She raised her arms in the air, and both men helped lift her shirt and bra away.
Standing back, they examined her appreciatively. She let them look, a little shy, a little impish. Jack and the Doctor each took a breast in one hand and wrapped the other arm around her back, holding her to them. Then they took turns kissing her as she craned her head eagerly to reach their mouths.
After a quick eye signal, the men bent to each suck a nipple into their mouths. Rose cried out and grasped their shoulders desperately. While they were down there, the Doctor unzipped her jeans and Jack slid his fingers under her panties. Almost immediately her hips bucked, she cried, “Oh! Oh!” and her whole body shuddered.
Jack and the Doctor grinned at each other triumphantly, and the Doctor noticed they were taking more of Rose’s weight on their shoulders as she relaxed. Jack picked her up and lay her at the edge of the bed so that he and the Doctor could finish stripping her of her jeans and sneakers, then Jack shifted her to the middle of the mattress, her head resting on a pillow, her body sprawled openly.
There had never been any doubt in the Doctor’s mind but that she would be beautiful, and she certainly was. About many things in life there were many options, but right now he had no choice but to crawl on top of her and kiss her. The heat of her body, the softness of her skin against his, her arms around him, felt better than he could have imagined.
It was admittedly odd to be doing this with a human, with humans, but it had been such a long time for him that his body didn’t care. This woman he cared about deeply. The man he’d known a shorter time, but he had gotten under the Doctor’s skin with surgical precision. Aesthetically, both his companions were stunning, but that alone wouldn’t have caught the Doctor’s attention. A man who had worn nine different bodies knew better than most that physical appearance was really the least important thing about a person. They were beautiful inside, too. Whatever they wanted, whatever he could give them, he would.
After several minutes of concentrated snogging he felt Jack’s hands on him, and realized that the other man was trying to guide him off of Rose. The Doctor lifted his mouth away from Rose’s reluctantly, but relaxed and trusted those hands to direct him onto his back next to her.
After leaning over the Doctor to drop a quick kiss on his lips, Jack moved down and without preamble took the Doctor’s cock into his mouth. The Doctor couldn’t help but groan – the heat, the suction, the stretch of Jack’s mouth around him, that thing he was doing with his tongue – it was almost too much. He quickly finished hardening, to an almost painful degree. He hadn’t been entirely sure he would be able to get there, but he shouldn’t have doubted, not with the inspiration he had to work with.
The Doctor gripped the bed sheets and closed his eyes, revelling in the pleasure running through his body. He whimpered a protest when the wet heat disappeared. Opening his eyes, he saw Jack positioning Rose over him, and guiding her down.
He locked eyes with Rose at the first touch of himself against her opening. He saw love and want, and hoped she saw the same thing in him. The Doctor felt a brief flash of gratitude to Jack. He wouldn’t have minded if Jack had wanted to take Rose first, but now found that it meant so much to him to be the one. He and Rose had grown closer than he had ever expected them to, and this moment was the affirmation of what they had become for each other.
Jack’s hands on her hips, Rose sank down onto him, and to the Doctor it felt like being home.
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part 3